Friday, March 26, 2010
Be! Excited! Be! Be! Excited!
You know what sucks? Eggs.
I hate eggs. I hate eggs in nearly every one of their mucousy little manifestations. As far as I'm concerned they're chicken feti and it should be taboo to consume them. Any yet there I was this morning, scrambling up a couple of those bad boys for breakfast. I think I managed 4 bites before passing them over to my kid.
I, Klassymomma, have started an intense, doctor supervised weight loss program, and have to learn to like eggs. As of today I am on a high protein, low fat, looooow carb diet. It sucks. I hate it. I want an apple. My kingdom for an apple!
Normally I hate the idea of radical diets. I personally feel that your weight loss program needs to be something you can stick with forever, or else the pounds are going to come back and they're bringing their friends. They're bitches like that. But after years of doing it on my own, going down 50 and up 80, down 40 and up 60, down 70 and up 100 I've decided that it's time for something drastic. It's no longer just about looking better or fitting into cute clothes (though I CAN'T WAIT to get my butt into some nice jeans!), but about being able to run around with my kid. He EXHAUSTS me! I was so impressed when he took his first step at 7 months. Now I look back and see it as the last calm day of my life. I love him so much, and he deserves a mom who lives life to the fullest instead of being trapped in a fat suit.
So for you, Dawson, I am changing my life. You damnwell better appreciate it when you're older!
It's 2pm on day 1 and I'm thus far successful. Scrambled eggs for breakfast, a salad with cucumber and bean sprouts for a snack (what can I say, I haven't really shopped for this adventure yet) and another salad with grilled chicken for lunch. Crystal Light lemonade with breakfast (my feeble attempt to replicate my beloved, verboten orange juice) and coke zero with lunch. I'm resigned to the fact I'll be living on chicken and asparatame for the next 6 months.
Yes, 6 months. I'm signing up for this for 6 months. It seems like a long time, but really, in the grand scheme of things it's not. I'm 27, that's 54 6-month periods I've lived through. I can spend one devoting my efforts to serious weight loss. In those 6 months, I'd love to lose at least 40lbs. I don't think that's impossible, or irrational. I know that I, and only I, have complete control over how successful this is.
I don't plan on staying on this diet long term. Like I said, I hate fad diets. Eventually I want to join weight watchers, which I'll proabably be sticking with for the rest of my life. Someone once told me that losing weight is easy, it's keeping it off that's hard. I believe it. But I can do it. I need to do it. I will do it.
I will do it.
I am doing it.
I really want an apple.
I hate eggs. I hate eggs in nearly every one of their mucousy little manifestations. As far as I'm concerned they're chicken feti and it should be taboo to consume them. Any yet there I was this morning, scrambling up a couple of those bad boys for breakfast. I think I managed 4 bites before passing them over to my kid.
I, Klassymomma, have started an intense, doctor supervised weight loss program, and have to learn to like eggs. As of today I am on a high protein, low fat, looooow carb diet. It sucks. I hate it. I want an apple. My kingdom for an apple!
Normally I hate the idea of radical diets. I personally feel that your weight loss program needs to be something you can stick with forever, or else the pounds are going to come back and they're bringing their friends. They're bitches like that. But after years of doing it on my own, going down 50 and up 80, down 40 and up 60, down 70 and up 100 I've decided that it's time for something drastic. It's no longer just about looking better or fitting into cute clothes (though I CAN'T WAIT to get my butt into some nice jeans!), but about being able to run around with my kid. He EXHAUSTS me! I was so impressed when he took his first step at 7 months. Now I look back and see it as the last calm day of my life. I love him so much, and he deserves a mom who lives life to the fullest instead of being trapped in a fat suit.
So for you, Dawson, I am changing my life. You damnwell better appreciate it when you're older!
It's 2pm on day 1 and I'm thus far successful. Scrambled eggs for breakfast, a salad with cucumber and bean sprouts for a snack (what can I say, I haven't really shopped for this adventure yet) and another salad with grilled chicken for lunch. Crystal Light lemonade with breakfast (my feeble attempt to replicate my beloved, verboten orange juice) and coke zero with lunch. I'm resigned to the fact I'll be living on chicken and asparatame for the next 6 months.
Yes, 6 months. I'm signing up for this for 6 months. It seems like a long time, but really, in the grand scheme of things it's not. I'm 27, that's 54 6-month periods I've lived through. I can spend one devoting my efforts to serious weight loss. In those 6 months, I'd love to lose at least 40lbs. I don't think that's impossible, or irrational. I know that I, and only I, have complete control over how successful this is.
I don't plan on staying on this diet long term. Like I said, I hate fad diets. Eventually I want to join weight watchers, which I'll proabably be sticking with for the rest of my life. Someone once told me that losing weight is easy, it's keeping it off that's hard. I believe it. But I can do it. I need to do it. I will do it.
I will do it.
I am doing it.
I really want an apple.
Monday, March 22, 2010
A love letter....
...to Anthony Wiggle.
Oh Anthony, the wiggle in blue. The leader. The Grand Poobah. The Leonardo to the rest of the Ninja Turtles. In your tight black jeans, rocking out on your red guitar. You trigger my gaydar, but in that 'gay or foreign' way, so I can still swoon. And I will. *Swoon!*
I love you, Anthony Wiggle. I'll Wiggle and Learn with you any day of the week.
Oh Anthony, the wiggle in blue. The leader. The Grand Poobah. The Leonardo to the rest of the Ninja Turtles. In your tight black jeans, rocking out on your red guitar. You trigger my gaydar, but in that 'gay or foreign' way, so I can still swoon. And I will. *Swoon!*
I love you, Anthony Wiggle. I'll Wiggle and Learn with you any day of the week.
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